Gospel singer Todd Dulaney and his wife Kenya recently sat down with MommyNoire to discuss the benefits of marriage God’s way. Todd just released his sophomore album, A Worshipper’s Heart this spring. The hit single, “The Anthem,” has spread like wildfire across the country and the Dulaneys are using their platform to share not only great music, but also good news about the benefits of marriage and partnership over everything.
When asked about how they still believe in marriage during a season where the divorce rate in the U.S. is over 50%, Todd responded,
“We honestly stop and say quite often, “How could I do life without you helping me with this?” I believe the easiest way out is always to get divorced. This is the easy way out, because it takes the weight off of having to compromise and come together with another person. It is the easy way out, but it is not as gratifying. My wife and I, we are not perfect. It’s not that we do not have problems or arguments. It’s just that life is more gratifying, and we share the burden of everything together. This makes life easy and fun to do it with someone else.”
Todd went on to say, ” To answer that, I will say that when we face trials, divorce is an easy way out. If you are not strong enough to say I am going to make this work regardless then the easy way will always be the way that you take. With us, we made our mind up, rather it be for the sake of the fact that we are Christians and we believe the word and for the fact that we know there is nothing outside of our marriage worth going after.”
The Dulaney’s who have been very vocal about the rocky start of their marriage, mostly because it didn’t start off God’s way, had to make adjustments along the way.
Kenya: One of the things that we bumped heads with was communication. We were talking, but sometimes what I would say to him would go in one ear and out the other. I was talking, but he was not listening. He was talking, but I was not listening. The one day that we sat down and talked and air everything out, we just decided to listen. From then we learned how to communicate better with each other.
Todd: To go even further back then that. Our start, we did not start biblically accurate. We had to make an adjustment midstream. We were definitely sexually active (before marriage) which clouded judgment. We have made it a crazy point, regardless of the fact that we stand before the church, we wanted to let people know that we did not do it right on the front end. With our start, we were sexually active before marriage, we got pregnant before marriage, and we did not really take our time with entering into the whole thing of marriage. We were really learning as we go, but we both made a decision not to abort this. We are not going to take the easy way out, and we are going to learn each other. And it took two people who were willing to do it. Like now, I really believe that my marriage is the best marriage. I have the bomb marriage. Whereas before we were both like, “No, we cannot make it.” Man, I thank God we stayed together, because now I see this is really the best woman for me.
Kenya: Aww, babe. {sighs and laughs}
Todd: See this is why I like to do my interviews in private, because she hears me boasting about her. {laughs}
Todd then elaborated on why having sex before marriage can cloud your judgement.
As far as the sex before marriage piece, whether you are Christian, atheist, or anything, sex before marriage can cloud your judgment. We got into each other physically before anything. We were dating and crushing on each other real hard, but we got into each other physically and it started a roller coaster. I was into my wife like super physically before anything, and I was very vocal to her about it. I was like “Man, I think you are so sexy.” And I was not thinking about my relationship with God or anything else. This took us on a rollercoaster out of control, and it took us a long time before we were both really making love vs. just crushing on each other and craving each other in a passionate way before we got an understanding of each other mentally.